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Execution cannot be pardoned, ”or how to react if your girlfriend communicates with her ex?

Despite the fact that in relations with a girl there may be a complete idyll, her communication with an ex-boyfriend becomes a big problem and the basis for quarrels. Specialists advise attentive to the girl’s behavior, but not to control her in all actions, words and deeds. Not knowing what to do when a girl communicates with her ex, how to react to such behavior, many men ruin their relationship.

In fact, communication with the ex-boyfriend is not considered such a big problem, because of which young people can quarrel or disagree. To begin with, a couple needs a frank conversation, during which they find out the motive for this behavior, the goals and format of communication with this guy, as well as the risks that this connection hides. Based on this information, a man will understand whether he should limit this communication.

Why does the girl communicate with the former?

The situation in which a girl began to communicate with an ex-boyfriend, due to her ticklishness and delicacy, requires careful study and investigation. It is difficult for men to take any action, on the one hand, they do not want to seem incredulous and suspicious, on the other, this is a clear sign of disrespect for him, and the worm of doubt still haunts us.

Knowing for sure why the girl communicates with the former, the man will be able to find an excuse for her behavior. And there may be several reasons, for example:

  1. A way to prove that a girl is not an empty place. If a girl still has feelings for her ex-boyfriend, her existing boyfriend can become a tool to prove that the girl is always in demand and is popular.
  2. The desire to return to the ex-boyfriend. It is rare that one of the women ends a relationship without a fallback. It happens that a new guy is used only to survive a break with a loved one.
  3. The ex-boyfriend understands her. If there are years of joint life and strong relationships between former lovers, they must have become relatives for each other. But with the current boyfriend there is no such kindred relationship, moreover, the girl is not ready to open before him, preferring the former as a vest and support.
  4. Revenge for the current guy. Often continues to communicate with an ex-boyfriend only in order to take revenge on the too loving current chosen one, who does not deny himself communication with the opposite sex.

Other reasons include communication, as a way of manipulation, an option of causing jealousy on the part of the current guy, if passion has died out in a relationship. There are also quite adequate and understandable reasons for a man, for example, the circumstances in which you have to communicate if the former partners work or study together, etc.

What if a girl talks to her ex as a friend?

In the case, the girl communicates with the former as with a friend, the current guy first of all needs to maintain composure and sobriety of the mind, not succumbing to anger, jealousy and other emotions.

Psychologists advise giving time for the emotions to subside, and then perform a series of actions:

  • Conversation. The best solution to the question of what to do if the girl communicates with the former, will be a frank conversation heart to heart. During the dialogue, the man should avoid accusations against her, control and any provocations of negative emotions. A man needs to be explained that such her behavior is perceived by him as disrespect, so he asks to change the situation. Be sure to ask about the motives and goals of such communication.
  • Ultimatum. If after the conversation she continues to communicate with the ex-boyfriend, the man needs to be firm, so as not to be seen as weak-willed in her eyes. Obviously, only an ultimatum will show who is more expensive for her, the current or former guy.
  • The conversation of the current guy with an ex-boyfriend. Sometimes when it is impossible to get out of such a situation, you just need to talk like a man with an ex-boyfriend, perhaps in a dialogue a man learns a lot about his passion.
  • Attention. Sometimes girls provoke men with such actions only to attract attention by playing on a feeling of jealousy. The man only needs to give her the very attention, affection and care that solve the problem.
  • Conversation with her friend. Sometimes when communicating with a girlfriend of your girlfriend, you can find out the true motives, because of which she prefers to maintain communication with her ex.
  • Parting. If her communication with the ex-boyfriend causes a hurricane of negative emotions, excitement and stress, and she does not take any action, most likely these relationships are doomed.

Should I limit communication?

If a girl has good reasons to communicate with her ex-boyfriend, it is not always advisable to limit her to this. For example, if they study in one institution and even a group, they will still have to communicate, regularly intersecting in the classroom. If a man will put pressure on her, show jealousy, a lack of trust always leads to a break in relations.

To understand the format of communication with a former guy, you can get to know him yourself, spend time together to cast bad thoughts out of your head. And only if the girl is deceiving or not saying something, but doesn’t respond to the request to limit herself to such contacts, the man needs to raise the question with an edge - either me or him. This way of solving the problem will show to whom she has true feelings.

Conclusion

In rare cases, young people who have already broken up manage to maintain good friendships. More often, the former simply stop communicating, especially if they are in a new relationship. Therefore, many men will not like the fact that the girl communicates with her ex. Psychologists advise talking to understand her motives, to explain their attitude to such communication, so there is a way out of the situation.

Meetings Behind Your Back

One of the most unpleasant options is when she secretly texted (perhaps it is a meaningless "Hello! How are you?", But still) and meets with the former. There can be anything in life, and perhaps you are out of luck, because your girlfriend deep down does not consider him to be former, but you as temporary. Perhaps in this way she amuses her pride. But more often it happens that a former man who left himself, slamming the door loudly, suddenly realized his mistake and was trying to return the girl, or simply wants to forget about the problems next to the person with whom he was previously comfortable. And your kind friend simply cannot refuse mercy to him, well, or nothing human is alien to her, and she simply experiences a vengeful pleasure from his sufferings.

What to do in this case? The fact that your girlfriend hid her "charity" actions from you seems to indicate that she does not really trust you. In this case, it would be most advisable to discuss everything calmly (without accusations and “assaults”) and give her the opportunity to speak out. There is a great chance that as a result of this it turns out that for a long time it seems to you that you do not need it, it is unimportant and uninteresting. And here the best thing that can be done is to let her speak out, to let her know that she is the best, and this is beyond any doubt, and at the same time promise (and, if possible, fulfill the promise) to be more attentive.

If the former is a “sacred cow”

If from the very beginning of your relationship she stipulated that communication with the former is almost sacred, and he is practically an artifact, then you should not be surprised. That is, her former is already semi-mythical, but dear to her as a character. Perhaps he took her out of a burning house or gave her to write off in the fifth grade on the control, not the point. The important thing is that forbidding them to meet is the worst thing you can do. This will almost completely provoke her departure. Not to the former, and not because he is the subject of worship or passion, but because she will feel infringed on the right to personal space.

Therefore, the best solution in this case is to treat the (already your common) former, as an elderly relative, periodically appearing on the horizon, that is - restrained, indifferent, and even a little mocking. And your girl will certainly appreciate the nobility, calmness and self-confidence.

Former jealousy

A fairly common option is when a girl uses her ex to make you jealous, and this is because she obviously lacks your attention, or she obviously lacks adrenaline in your relationship. Well, or she reread chivalric novels in her childhood and still dreams of “visiting” the chivalric tournament. The way out of this situation is very simple: play along with her. If it seems to you that you have cooled somewhat, then maybe it’s worthwhile to “give in to the heat”? A number of jealousy scenes will come in handy.

But, if you do not like such games, then the situation can be simplified utterly: invite your girlfriend to introduce you to her ex. Well, since they are friends, and she is your girlfriend, it is quite logical to meet her friend, and if the girl dreamed of a knightly tournament, then here he is, please. No, it is not necessary to prepare spears, but it is witty and graceful to show that you are the present, and he - the joyless and, possibly, inglorious past, is very necessary.

If your girlfriend is a fool

Yes, no matter how regrettable it sounds, but it happens. And it happens if your girlfriend not only constantly meets with her ex, but also constantly compares you, and the comparison is clearly not in your favor. And if you can close your eyes to comparing your literary and cinematic tastes, then comparing your sex life with the exploits of your ex is no longer worth it. No matter how sad it may sound, but your girl is a fool. Give it back to your ex. With things. No fight. He still will not last long.

Instead of an epilogue

And one more tip instead of the epilogue. If you have a girlfriend, don't date your ex. Take it as an axiom. You can’t meet with the former, especially if you recently broke up, and she is still pretty and lonely. To explain to one girl that you are just friends with another girl is almost impossible, and it is absolutely impossible to explain to the current girl that you are just friends with your ex-girlfriend. Especially since you are, after all, not so simple friends, are you?

Possible motives

The girl’s communication with the former throws seeds of jealousy and distrust in the heart of the current partner, which gradually destroy the relationship

In order not to blame absolutely all the girls for their cunning intentions, it is important to immediately take into account that former lovers can maintain a warm relationship without any background. Cases where, after parting, recent lovers remain friends, are not uncommon, so this outcome should be taken into account in the first place.

But no matter how warm the relationship of the former, the current partner may be dissatisfied with the presence of another in the life of his girlfriend. Moreover, such communication can harm the love line. To take the right position in this implicit triangle, it is important to understand the reasons that motivate the girl to keep communicating with her previous boyfriend.

  • The desire to use the current guy as a tool to prove to the former that she is still interesting to the opposite sex.
  • An attempt to return to the ex-partner. A very frequent scenario, when a girl simply tries to restore her old relationship, waiting for a “storm” next to her new boyfriend. Particularly dangerous for the relationship is the option when communication resumed suddenly, after a long silence of the former.
  • He understands her. If the past relationship lasted several years, it is quite possible that the girl is simply looking for support, because that guy probably feels her emotions and empathizes.
  • Of revenge. Often, girls try to avenge their current partner for their grievances, provoking jealousy. This is a way of manipulation, which they seem to show that they can leave at any moment.

These reasons should be considered first of all if the girl began to communicate with the former after a significant break.

If a girl is in no hurry to talk about her true motives, you can try to find out about them from her best friend. Often the girls share “insidious” plans among themselves, but they don’t differ in their special ability to keep secrets. It is important not to put pressure on a friend, but to sincerely ask about the reasons and ask for advice.

Sometimes it turns out that the girl has been talking with the former for a long time, but did not talk about it. In this case, the option of manipulating jealousy disappears. Also, do not consider simple friendly communication, since in this case it would not make sense to hide it. If she insists on this, it is worth remembering if you once frightened her sincerity with your jealousy.

How to proceed

If a girl has good reasons to communicate with an ex-boyfriend, it is not always advisable to limit her to this (for example, if they study together)

A completely natural reaction of the current guy will be an attempt to stop such a friendship. There are several ways to do this.

The surest option is a frank conversation. The conversation should not bear the character of a quarrel. Do not blame the partner or manipulate in response. It is enough to find out the reason for the emergence of ex-friendship and explain to a half that such behavior hurts you. Moreover, it is important to ask without pressure to stop such meetings and contacts, so as not to harm the existing relationship.

If a girl carefully concealed her ongoing relationship with her ex, which suddenly opened up to her current boyfriend, he should show his strength of character and deliver an ultimatum. It is important not to give slack and not provide any options other than a break with a former or current partner. The method looks like a manipulation, which is what it actually is, but most often it is it that saves the relationship from the invasion of undesirable persons.

You can arrange a conversation with the "hero of the occasion" himself. Having talked in a manly way with a potential rival (which is quite possible without assault), it will turn out to break the unwanted friendship of the girl without her participation.

If a girl began to communicate with her ex after a long break, it’s important for the current guy to give her partner what she needs. If in an ex-boyfriend she is looking for understanding, then it's time to provide her personally. There are commonplace methods like imitation. If the ex continues to walk together, you yourself should keep your soulmate company so that she does not look for her in an ex-boyfriend.

If a guy has long known about the communication of his passion with the former, but this has ceased to suit him for some reason, his partner should explain why the attitude to these circumstances has changed (and first of all to admit to himself). You have serious intentions regarding the girl, or it began to seem that her communication with the former goes beyond the boundaries of friendship - a frank conversation in a peaceful manner will help clarify the situation. If the beloved does not bring weighty arguments for continuing to communicate with the former, it is worth considering how she considers her current partner, and take further steps - to strengthen the courtship or put an ultimatum.

When the situation obliges

If a girl communicates with her ex because they study and work together, you should take it calmly and at least outwardly maintain confidence in her and your relationship

It happens that it is impossible to limit the communication of his girlfriend with a former partner. This happens when ex-partners study or work together. In this case, it is worth building the most trusting relationship with the girl. It is important that she is not afraid to tell you about her affairs. Therefore, during such conversations it is worth restraining emotions and flashes of jealousy.

It will also be useful to establish acquaintances with members of the same team. Having a faithful companion in the circle of communication of your girlfriend, you can know about the "latest news" firsthand. And she herself will be as restrained as possible, knowing that she is being secretly monitored.

When one way out

If a girl constantly compares the current partner with the previous one in favor of the latter, it would be better to leave her

It happens that such ex-communication causes so intense feelings that it is impossible to control them. If at the same time the girl does not make any attempts to level the situation, it makes sense to think about parting. Most likely, such a relationship is doomed to eternal jealousy and quarrels.

The game is not worth the candle when the meetings of the former take place not in neutral territory, but in solitude. In most cases, this is not easy communication, and the current partner should not convince themselves that they play chess.

As the saying goes, there is no smoke without fire, so it is important to understand immediately the reasons for the girl to communicate with her former partner. At the same time, it is worth making the decision as quickly as possible on measures to suppress such friendship if it threatens your love.

The girl began to chat with the former 18 Feb 2018 15:40 # 1

I have been talking with my girlfriend for 8 months. I recently found out that she has been talking with an ex-boyfriend for two months. When I asked her what the hell are you talking to, she said that I speak with her a little and that this is just a friend. Then it means I pulled her into conversation. Seriously told her. I tell her that tell me honestly if you want to be with him go I don’t hold you. She cries and swears that she loves only me and I am her only man. That she perceives him as a friend. I tell her again, listen, tell me honestly, and we will be friends. She again swears that I am her only and that no one except me as a man needs her. Then I don’t know what happened to me, but I became soft and believed her. He also presented a ring that day. But the next day I realized that I behaved like a rag and that I had to react harshly. In the evening, again to talk, and I say to her, give me your phone; I want to read your correspondence. She gives me what I read, it means that they communicate on the subject of music, all sorts of ***, she asks him about the family. But the correspondence is very very large. He sends pictures to her there. It was all very touching and cute that looked like that. I noticed just basically she wrote to him herself when he was online. Like, good morning, I see someone woke up, have a good day, that I ate what I drank about what I wrote above. After I read the transcript, she began to tell her that I didn’t understand anything at all and was confused and I needed time to think things over. He said that he wanted to marry her and have a family, but now I doubt it. Has not appeared for 3 days. The soul is very hard. I do not want to lose her because her character in terms of relationships and as a woman is very good. Always feed, drink everything will do as it should. Before that, a month ago, she invited me to a wedding where her relatives were and introduced her to her parents. Her mother even began to call me son-in-law. But why she needed to break everything I do not understand. Why did she need to start communication with her ex. Now two thoughts in my head torment me. The first is that I did not need to react so much and disappear, but rather be with her, spend more attention because she swears with tears that she loves only me and at this moment it is better to be with her and not let her do stupid things and distract her. The second thought is that it is a complete bl. and she just needs me as a reserve, because I make good money and I have money. But she never asked for money. I never think this is also very important. I always told her that I had serious plans for her. She was happy to cry and so on. Guys help me figure out what to do and how to behave right now. By the way, another very important point. He goes to the gym and plays the guitar. She recently told me that she really wants to learn how to play the guitar. He sends her all kinds of letters by correspondence. Send her a forest or try in a week or two to try again and appear. And also we have sex with her and all things. Before that, she had sex with him, but as I understand it, if he has not made her an offer for such a long time, then he doesn’t need her. Since they have been communicating since 2012. She told him about me. And when on the first day I came to her and forgave her immediately wrote to him about it. constantly in contact with him. In general, I am completely confused. Why would she write to him every day if she tells me that she loves only me? Why is she with me if he is. Or can friendship really be?

Mat is prohibited. Ban for a week.

The girl began to chat with the former 25 Feb 2018 17:03 # 2

  • Ruslan
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Mat prohibited, swearing ban for a week.

In fact, everything is bad. The former is you, not him. He is just loved and desired.

Natalya Maratovna Rozhnova

Psychologist. Specialist from the site b17.ru

It’s better to forget. Once I started talking with other ML, including the former, it means she definitely doesn’t want anything with you anymore. Trust me.

Throw it or freeze. She is flattered that so much attention and you are still jealous) These are women, make her see that you feel good without her, the first will make contact) only do you need this contact later

She's manipulating you, that's all. She is flattered that you are like a wimp and a rag is lying at your feet, and she wipes shit about you from the shoe. He sets the conditions, they say if you sincerely apologize. What for is it necessary? She will later say that you DO NOT apologize SINCERELY, or something else, in general, you will be guilty anyway, and you shit for free. Finish it.

Artem, how did you find out about their communication? So you are sure of this information, for starters? Diverges so immediately it is not necessary, talk to her, ask about her communication with the former! And if you understand that she really communicates closely with the former, and is not going to refuse it for your sake, then already think about breaking up (

invite her to get married! she certainly does not expect this turn of events.

Campaign you specifically brought her brain.

Campaign you specifically brought her brain.

Good afternoon. My name is Irina. I work in the detective agency UKS. We carry out any investigations.
If there are suspicions of treason, problems with domestic violence, legal advice was urgently needed, etc. Everything is solvable. We do the detailing. t. 495 5064979 (round-the-clock) .or www.sishik.com

Good afternoon. My name is Irina. I work in the detective agency UKS. We carry out any investigations.
If there are suspicions of treason, problems with domestic violence, legal advice was urgently needed, etc. Everything is solvable. We do the detailing. t. 495 5064979 (round-the-clock) .or www.sishik.com

Everyone understands that a person will not write such nasty things to himself. These are the words of those candidates who applied for a vacant place in the detective agency SKS.
Some friends with no, no higher education, no qualifications and special training wish to work in a detective agency. In order to have a claim for a good salary and a vacant place in a detective agency, you must have an education, experience and experience in law enforcement are also required, each applicant passes a mandatory probationary period of 25 days.
I guess who could write such comments to the detective agency YuKS and advise you to finish, at least some technical school. The desire to work is one thing, and the ability to work is another. Do you need money because you have problems? I need professionals
You have not passed the trial period (to identify other new products). so work on yourself.

My ex-husband is a famous businessman. I was very afraid that when the identity of the object to be tracked becomes clear, they will simply surrender him to me for money. It was scary, to be honest. I went through a bunch of detective agencies and private traders, stopped at the detective agency yuks. I recommend to everyone in need. Divorce is already in the past, but I found out everything about my husband that I wanted, but he still did not suspect anything. Thanks to Alexander, I respect you!

And why did you then take me and others to work if we, so to speak, have no education,
in your opinion?))))
Friends, the salary in question is 30,000 rubles a month. Laughter, really. ))))
But even Mr. "Director" has no desire to pay it.))))
And you, Mr. Director, before judging the education of other people, it would not be bad
learn to write correctly, for starters.
You, Alexander Badrievich, have personally failed the external surveillance of the object.
And then they hung noodles on the ears of the client. So I think you should work on yourself.
The coordinates of the hairless client, I can give.
Reviews, both on the site and on other resources, are written by the employees themselves, former or present,
often free. Mr Director also asked me to leave a review on his website.
Now leaves reviews Yaroshevskaya Julia.
When I was not paid wages, I wrote a negative review on the Internet.
By the way, I worked for 2.5 months without days off. My trial period was 2 weeks.
Then Alexander Badrievich called me on the phone with death threats.

Yeahhhh. Well, you’ve got yourself a submarine snake. oh bliiiin, THROW HER CHUVAAAAK. BEGIIII FROM HER. Change the name, phone number, but I beg you to BROTHER, BEGIIII. Yes, she herself doesn’t know what she wants, she wants to hang out and talk with the guys and flutter, she would need a family, she would work at home in the hut, cook, clean up with you, spend time, and not at the entrance to the baklakha, . Our masculine species are dying out, one mischief has remained, the nature of the joke is such, it can’t be changed if it’s already lying to you, plus it’s talking with the former farmers, what will happen next, did you even imagine? Karoche is all 100 poods end, I answer you, I’m even ready to bet a million dollars, in the end you will send it yourself.

My wife, at the beginning of our relationship, also met, talked with the former. I did not plan to continue the relationship then. Now I regret that I did not put an ultimatum, although there was no sex between them.
Actually, it's dirt, if a girl allows herself this. Now I wouldn’t forgive it!


My wife, at the beginning of our relationship, also met, talked with the former. I did not plan to continue the relationship then. Now I regret that I did not put an ultimatum, although there was no sex between them.
Actually, it's dirt, if a girl allows herself this. Now I wouldn’t forgive it!

The right reaction is the first step in understanding what to do with the problem i

The first thing to do when you find out that your girlfriend is texting with your ex is to understand how you feel. In truth, any reaction is correct, only each person has his own reaction.

About 31% of men mimic an orgasm. This helps them to better know the partner and prepare for the second act.

If you are a cheerful guy who sees only positive aspects in everything, then you will surely find a lot of advantages here. For example, you do not need to spend round the clock talking with your beloved, because you have a changer, and you yourself can safely allocate time for some other things. In addition, an ex-boyfriend is better than stupid envious girlfriends who continually clog your beloved tanks.

He knows her well, and if they continue to communicate, then their relationship is benevolent. In principle, you yourself can begin to communicate with him, it is possible that he is not only a great former guy with whom your girlfriend is “just friends”, but will also become a reliable friend for you.

The destiny of a woman is to rule, the destiny of a man is to reign, because passion dominates, but the mind rules.

If the heating pad interferes, it means that you have already warmed up. If the wife interferes, then you have already cooled down.

Women are indeed much better than men. Otherwise, they would be unbearable.

For those who do not like such a way out of the situation, an absolutely opposite option will do. You can always fall into the rage of a berserker: to create violent hysteria, to destroy the apartment, to throw out the girl’s mobile phone. You should not go overboard with this, otherwise the neighbors can call people in white coats with tranquilizers and a straitjacket.

And if you are completely inadequate, and you are not worried about the criminal liability for causing grievous bodily harm, then you can safely turn to the assault.

Those who are not particularly worried about such twists of fate can do nothing. While you relax and learn Zen, let your beloved do what he wants: she is an adult and a free citizen of her country, who has the right to commit any actions that do not contradict the Criminal Code. But of course, as an alternative, you can just talk to each other and discuss what you like or dislike about this situation.

We develop a strategy, determine the action plan 2

Communication with former lovers is not always bad, but if you are sure that this is not good, and you have a potential competitor (which, in addition, has a number of advantages), then you have to act decisively. Here, as in the case of the reaction, you must choose what is closest to you. Advising something specific in a situation where a girl is texting with her ex is difficult, but here are some options:

Plan A "Insidious." It is not known what this type of person is that has riveted the attention of your lover, therefore it is better not to risk it and not to approach it. Ideally, if you will in every way interfere with their communication. If this is SMS correspondence, look for any opportunity to take possession of the phone of your passion so that it does not recognize, delete messages and the competitor’s number.

If they communicate on social networks, you probably know how to turn off the Internet. Or vice versa, while the girl does not see, go to her page and put this guy on the black list. But be careful! If you meet young Miss Marple, then this plan is doomed to failure from the very beginning.

Plan B "Warlike." If you are a true alpha male and are determined to win your woman at all costs, then there is no need to be careful. The least flawed way to resolve the conflict is to get a phone number or a link to a competitor’s page, contact him and calmly explain that you do not like him a little, that he writes to your lover. Did not help? Or maybe the guy admitted that he has grandiose plans for your soulmate?

It's time to start the second stage - make an appointment for a "purely masculine" conversation, where the fists will say everything for you. But here you need to thoroughly prepare: find out more about this type, especially with regard to his physical fitness.

And just in case, find out if he has any “cover” (relatives in law enforcement agencies, paratrooper friends, etc.). And if it is important for you that the beloved’s dream remains strong, it is better to keep her in ignorance.

Plan B Obsessive. The name of the plan should speak for itself. If your darling began to pay you less attention, you need to fix it. I noticed that she received a message, and she was going to answer - grab her and spin in her arms, persuade her to take a walk right now or watch a movie. And when she is distracted, return to plan A.

If this does not help, openly demonstrate hostility to her ex and discontent with the fact that they communicate. And do not forget to show yourself from the very best side: give gifts, say compliments, often take her on dates, in general, remind you in every possible way that she is dating you, and not with the former.

Remember that any option may be ineffective. It is best, of course, to remain calm and behave as a rational and balanced person. And the right decision will come by itself. And the most important thing is to trust your girlfriend and not allow yourself to doubt her.

What to do if a girl communicates with an ex-boyfriend

The girl began to communicate with the former 25 Feb 2018 19:03 # 3

  • Alexander Biryukov
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What cutie she is, however! In one phrase, and immediately two birds with one stone. The first hare killed by you is instilled with a feeling of guilt, which is called "no attention", and then, on occasion, they will dump you from this phrase. The second innocently killed hare follows from the first, and the lady thus prescribes herself an indulgence for all her future actions in relation to the extraneous male sex. Is it clear to you? It is you and not her who are to blame for her behavior and social circle.

It seems to me that these words were superfluous. Why ask who he is for her? Anyway, your lady will never tell the truth. It was enough to explain that such a variant of the relationship is unacceptable for you, and if your lady does not stop communicating with this man, you part without separation.

The lady deftly played on your sense of possessiveness, reassuring you, and telling you the words that you wanted to hear. In reality, she should have told you that you were important to her and she would cease all contact with that man.
But on the ring you hit!

This is called active flirting. And the initiator of this flirtation is your lady. Based on the volume of correspondence, which is very, very large, we can draw the following conclusions:
1. A lady spends most of her personal time for correspondence over a long time period, therefore there can be no talk of any friendship here. Or is she also actively chatting with friends? And when, then, does she eat sleep and work?
2. An outsider is also interested in this correspondence, since he supports her with such activity. Two altruists overwhelmed by friendship? I do not think so.

Baba Yaga also fed, watered and washed in the bathhouse. Only then I wanted to fry and eat then

Wahhhhhh! . This is her mother you from the first meeting began to call in-law? Or did you feel like that during the month of daily communication? But even a month of daily communication with a potential mother-in-law is disastrously small to deserve such a drive. For some reason, it seems to me that you are being taken on a role in a play called "family life."

Uhhhh! Hello! You got married and family! And your hmmmm. call it softer. lady, she tells you in plain text that she can do stupid things. What kind of human reliability can we talk about here, if the key to the continuation of your relationship is not the desire of the lady, but your supervisory functions behind her!? This thing is called the “save me from yourself / from the dragon” manipulation. In addition, the basis of any manipulation is to knock a person out of the habitual state when he cannot adequately assess the situation. You have already been knocked out of state of mind. They made me doubt myself and my ratings.

Well, that's right! You are not paying attention. She has the same interests as an outsider. Therefore, she can not only correspond with him, but also meet and take guitar lessons in the future. The lady will not miss.

I have more and more suspicions that the lady wants to marry stupidly, but she didn’t give a damn to that man (what to do, creative people are very unstable), and you were chosen for the role of husband. The guitarist was left "for the soul" and other pleasures, and you pull the family strap.

You don’t find it strange that a stranger almost instantly finds out about your movements and your relationship with a lady who, in theory, should not touch anyone except you two, and you learn about the existence of a stranger by accident, and you must unravel this story as a detective? Well, which of you two is closer to the lady?

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Watch the video: Rethinking infidelity . . a talk for anyone who has ever loved. Esther Perel (February 2020).

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